Monday, December 02, 2013

The Art of Not Giving A Shit

     I'm writing this piece in complete contrast to my original thoughts as i've come to new learning's and revelations this year. I've always been a more balanced individual, always trying to give people the benefit of the doubt, feeling bad for my actions and reactions. This year has been one of the biggest eye openers as the reality is...As close to balance as one may be you just can't please everyone. 

     No matter what you do at some point in your life you will have to choose and pick a side. People may not like  you especially when you stand up for yourself. Trying to please everyone is impossible and being the middle ground can lead to extreme burnout.  Most  'people pleasers' always spend too much time worrying about what others feel, how to rectify poor situations, or almost always compromise their happiness just to appease others, so much that they forget their own happiness. That is when burnout and self fatigue comes in. That's when you have to protect your soul and say 'I just don't give a shit'. I'm not implying that one should lash out in rebellious ways and go nuts on everyone, but stand up for yourself. If others are angry at your decision just ask yourself:

Would it matter in the long run if this person didn't like me even though I attempted to do whats right or tried to be fair? (if not stand by your decision, if so what are other alternatives to your decision)

So long as you made a decision the best way you know how that is what matters. Stand by good values, ethics, and principles. Being wrong will become a learning process, and making firm decision  develops internal strength. As we all know picking a side and making a decision is not always easy but it is necessary.


Thursday, November 07, 2013

The truth about marriage

     The advice you get from ''happily' married couples is candy coated, along the lines of 'you feel more bonding' and 'i married my best friend', and that everything appears blissful. How I initially envisioned marriage before I got married, boy was I in for a big surprise. Based on my own experience I'm going to share a bit of truth and realism to my marriage life.

As a couple we would talk about future children, our dreams, goals and aspirations and where we saw ourselves in 5 years time. Ideally, everyone wishes to be that picture perfect couple in the wedding studio pictures; realistically it's hard work.  Nobody ever tells you that though because couples don't openly share their bad moments for fear of judgement.

Although I do feel more bonding with my husband and there are plenty of good moments there comes a price. The price of obligation to family and in laws (in my world anyways), being selfless and all 'in' for the team (in some ways), and putting down your pride to make the relationship work. 

Marriage requires dedication and hard work. 

Its so much more easier to throw the silent treatment after an argument and think "he/she should know what they did wrong so I'll stay mad until they apologize". Pride has to be let down to diffuse the situation. (something that is difficult for the both of us to do since we're both so stubborn). However, marriage will provide opportunity for communication

We've heard time and time again that communication is the key to a successful relationship, and the usual advice you get from friends is "you should talk about it with him/her". Yea right, not that easy. Do people ever tell you how awkward it is, how difficult it is, how stubborn their loved ones are and whether the husband/wife are more talkers or listeners. It is best to 'talk' when the timing is right.

My husband is a listener and refuses to talk giving me one word answers. However, Through the years I've learned his style of communication, I've learned to open up the lines of the communication with him once things are calm (usually within the following 2 days). It's difficult to immediately approach the situation and 'talk about it' when things are tense and extremely awkward. Furthermore, talk with pride out of the way. 
Pride being out of the way is necessary since nobody wants to lose a fight, everyone wants to be right. However, how your significant other understands you is greater than you proving you are right.  
Julie Quan.Copyright©2013 ·All Rights Reserved
My Husband and I: Photographer Ted Kim @ The

Secondly, marriage means you have to selfless and 'all in for the team'..yes to an extent. It's great you can give your best to your lover but damn straight you would expect the same in return. Don't feel bad in doing so because THAT is what a marriage is. You can give your all, you take one for the team, yet at the same time don't feel bad about expecting something from your husband/wife. That is the joy of it, that they to are willing without hesitation to do a favor. (Favors and goals within reason and are realistic). You can't keep depositing without gaining any savings, you will be one burnt out lover. 

Lastly, people say "marriage completes me", "we've become one". Aww Hell to the No. You're your own person with your own identity. You share values, common goals, you've become united as husband/wife, but never should you lose your identity. It's great to spend time with your significant other but it's not necessary 24/7. It's important to realize a life outside of your marriage, it grounds you and provides balance in a relationship. Whether you can incorporate family time with things you love or find time to do them separately even for an hour a day I highly recommend it. 

Although I'm 'irked' by many of my husband's behavior and want to give him a good deck in the face at times, I feel blessed. He is wonderful in many ways,  but the truth is are we the 'happily ever after couple?' no..but we are happy in more ways than one. When you marry you marry for their positive and negative traits. Some they can leave at the door to marriage and some are traits embedded since childhood. I mean don't get me wrong there are those that probably have the most wonderful fairy tale marriages. With each and every negative thing I've experienced in my marriage I've gained a positive outcome but that goes without saying: Marriage is hard work and you have to keep dedicated as it can be ugly or it can be molded to how you want it to be. How do you want your marriage to be?

Here's wishing you all a workable and loving relationship filled with happiness and harmony

One Love

Wednesday, November 06, 2013

Quick To Judge

     Although we always learn to "never judge a book by it's cover" every person has preconceptions based on experiences with various people in our lives such as colleagues, family members, or friends. You may have negative emotions relating to these relationships and begin to develop a 'defense' mechanism on how to react and when to react to individuals you categorize to be within that realm of 'negative emotions'. Although it becomes almost automatic, judging others will cause even more damage to the internal soul leading to more resentment and unnecessary stress in our lives. 

I made the mistake one day by listening to a colleague talk about another person (we'll call her Brenda for the sake of simplicity).  My colleague stated that Brenda was lazy, controlling and likes to boss others around. I immediately became defensive as I refuse to let myself be subject to that behavior. It was like listening to a review on a movie that I have never watched, telling others I wouldn't watch a movie because it had poor reviews. Upon meeting Brenda and based on what I already know about her I reacted before she could get 2 words in. My assumptions and my tone altered how she responded and to say the least it created a disagreement between the two of us. 

Brenda has been with us for awhile now and has gotten along well with many colleagues. She is neither of the many things this one colleague had stated about her. Being too quick to judge and too defensive caused unnecessary stress at work on my part, furthermore I felt poorly about my behavior. 

     Stop your subconscious from preconceived notions about others, think before you talk, and listen to what others have to say. Doing so can help ease stress in every day life by developing a good work relationship with colleagues and possibly even make friends along the way. I'm not promoting that it is a must you become friends with everyone that you encounter but in all honesty it does ease stress levels by getting along with others. Simply by prohibiting judgement from encounters at the grocery stores to work and home life will make your days go smoother and stress free. Who wouldn't want that? So before you refuse to watch a movie based on a review you might want to check it out because who knows it might end up being a favorite that you will enjoy for a long time. 

One Love

Saturday, September 21, 2013

Feeling the Goodness

          This post was inspired by overhearing a group of women discussing about other women's dress attire during exercise and how the yoga pants are 'too spandex'ie'. Furthermore, they were belittling these women for wearing make up during exercise. It doesn't make sense I mean why would you want to wear make up during a sweat session? But you know what...maybe it makes them feel good?

     For some odd reason there is this taboo that going 'au naturel' and dressing your worst for a workout makes one appear better than the rest. If you're one to think this you might want to reconsider an attitude adjustment because most likely it's making you the ugly one. There are numerous reasons why people wear what they wear, and most likely it is because it makes them feel good.

     I for one had terrible skin all my life and have rarely gone without the bare minimum of make up, I love make up how it looks and makes me feel. Mind you I would love to go natural if I had the skin for it but I don't. Many people probably feel the same and whether you are a man or a woman and you feel the need to wear make up than 'work it like you should!

That is what make up is for: to add color, beauty, and to hide imperfections. There are ways to achieve that natural look. Sounds Ironic but like I said it's all about YOU and what makes YOU feel good. 

    Secondly, if a woman wants to wear tight lulu lemon pants during a work out I think it's great. If she looks good she feels good and vice versa. Head shaking and gossiping will do nothing for you gossipers.  Instead of focusing all that energy on other people's ass'ets you should be focusing on toning yours so that you TOO can look good in a pair of tight spandex.

So What do you do daily to make yourself feel good?

Product Review: I just want to share some things that I've used to achieve a flawless skin look even if you have acne prone skin, acne scarring, and or hyperpigmentation. This is great for everyday wear and does not require hours to apply. I've tried dozens of makeup lines and with my skin type trust me this works well.

 - If you have dry skin it is important you moisturize and apply sunscreen prior to applying primer. This primer will allow for a light smooth application of your foundation without having that 'cake' look especially after a long day. I have used this primer for more than half a day and it works just wonders with my foundation. Primer is necessary to achieve a smooth longer lasting look (moisturizing lotion is not a primer) as lotions will allow for a smooth application of foundation it will not last long and possibly smudge off. 

- This foundation is absolutely amazing if you have very sensitive acne prone/oily skin. It is a liquid foundation that allows for a gorgeous matted look that allows your skin to look smooth without that greasy shine. It is oil free and WILL not cause break outs. It has medium to fuller coverage to hide any imperfections to achieve that flawless look. You won't need much, I used to layer on two layers of foundation liquid but it was not necessary since I have started using this foundation. (if you have pitting acne scars 2 layers will help). If you have dry skin just apply a good moisturizer and than apply. Make up forever is a great makeup line that has been used by celebrities in studio and etc. You can't go wrong with a affordable high quality make up line. 

**I highly recommend this product. From L'Oreal, Maybelline, Lancome, Shu Uemura, and MAC. Nothing is as balanced in affordability and quality as Make Up Forever's foundation line**

- this is my favorite all time step in applying make up...the blush. No it is not a bronzer or finishing powder but it sure appears as one. I don't apply heavy foundation for this reason since the application of blush does it all. It is the finishing that creates that smooth flawless skin and adds to mild coverage of any pigmentation on top of the foundation. I have tanned/mild orange/yellow tinged Asian skin tone. The color 'dainty' or 'warm soul' from this blush line is great for everyday wear. This blush has lasted more than half a day without wearing out, even after a workout session.

The links i have provided you guys are cheaper in price than in retailers so check it out. 


Friday, September 13, 2013

The Traveling Bee

     The late bloomer: soul searching in my early twenties, schooling in my mid twenties, and currently now a career oriented individual working to pay off whatever life throws at me. As a result, I never had the opportunity to travel until these past couple years whether I had the money or not (well..within reason). I may not have been as crazy in my travels as I would have liked but I truly recommend those of you who are so caught up in life's ordeals to begin traveling and if possible before having children.

Traveling is like a breath of fresh air, a relief from all that surrounds you in your current state. Take for example: like watching the bachelor. Cast members are limited to their environment and surrounded by 'picked' men and women. Once they return to reality everything changes and the person they "so called" fell in love with within one months time become flawed. Outside of the film industry they see different people and different things they want, as it is the same with traveling. Traveling opens your realm of possibilities and opens your eyes to learning different languages, culture, and how others survive. Whether your travels are short or long both are beneficial to the human soul.

Furthermore, it is highly recommended for those of you to travel  without children if possible. Take the time to go on a honeymoon, unfortunately the reality is that traveling with children is not the same. All your trips will be family and children oriented at least until the children are older. Especially if you are one that enjoys adventure and long hikes. Not to say that it is impossible or less enjoyable with children but it is different.Traveling without children just makes things more simple. 
Post return from your travels with also feel good. You will feel refreshed and ready to begin life like turning a new leaf. Making the most of life is important and traveling is one of them, who knows you will find talent and possibly begin a new journey in life.

Here are some of my travel pictures to the Dominican which I absolutely LOVE.

My husband had bought some sweets from Costco and handed it out to some of the children in the villages.


We had the opportunity to eat original home made meals, and delicious Dominican coffee.Learning about culture and relaxing on beaches is my new found hobby.

If you're traveling to the beach I highly suggest bringing a water resistant camera. Although high end SLR cameras take great quality pictures, salt water can be severely damaging to the camera. Secondly you'll be standing there attempting to take quality pictures instead of 'actually' enjoying the beach. 

The camera I've used to take pictures is the Panasonic Lumix DMC T5SD. 16 megapixels which produces high end quality pictures, water resistant up to approximately 43 ft, and shockproof up to 6.6 ft. It has a GPS in which  you can locate the pictures and it has the ability to wi fi share with your mobile phone. 

**EXTREMELY durable, I brought it with me para sailing, parachuting, and rappelling, and spelunking. I got the camera completely covered in mud. Washed it off with non salted water, allowing it to dry and it works just fine.

Excellent camera among all water resistant cameras. I was able to capture moments that others were not able to since they had to leave behind their cameras during excursions. So, if you plan to travel on the beach or do some adventures this camera will do the job. Take a look on the products I've used on the left. The site will give you good prices compared to what you will find in stores. Comes in the blue or orange. Check it out.

Panasonic Lumix DMC-TS5D 16.1 MP Tough Digital Camera with 9.3x Intelligent Zoom (Orange)

Monday, September 09, 2013

Pushing Through

This is probably the one most single phrase that seems so easy yet so difficult to do. Life throws so many obstacles in our way that the climb to the top appears endless. Whether it be work, home dilemmas, or life in general. Everyone has varying degrees of challenges but I guess Nike had the right idea when they said “just do it”. This absolutely stands for everything. The only time that is safe to be at a temporary standstill is when you need a break or when things get overwhelming, but nonetheless self awareness is crucial. Realizing that the experience is a phase and once you’ve given yourself time.. It’s time to ‘push through’. Easier said than done right? Don’t get me wrong, the length of time it takes to heal, to realize, and to accept is different for everyone. However, once you’ve reached self awareness you might be ready, but you might feel uncertain..That’s where you have to give yourself that extra ‘push’ through. Like child stuck half way on water slide: with a little assistance you’ll soar past difficult times.

Being stuck in a phase well over a long period of time may cause one to internalize these emotions and channel them into negative ones. Finding reason and motivation helps the process with more ease. Let’s use a simple example of exercise. Almost 90-95% of people make new years resolutions to workout, get fit, and lose weight. Almost half never follow through as we hear the usual ‘I’m too busy’, ‘I have to work’, and ‘I’m too tired’. There are indefinitely individuals at the gym that would rather be spending their time doing other things but they love the aftermath of rushing happy endorphins post workout. These are their reasons and their motivations for exercise. Some individuals have goals to exercise contemplate on going to the gym but substitute eating during that hour that could be spent on being active, hence channeling the energy into something else. 

One personal example for me would be times when I just don’t want to go to work. It’s undeniable that almost everyone on this planet feels this way at one point in their lives. If you do feel this way it is important to distinguish whether these feelings stem from laziness or complete fatigue. The balance between having a rest is necessary. However, laziness is unacceptable and that is where your mantra should come into play: ‘I need to push through this and get it done’. Think about your goals, think about what and whom you’re doing the deed for and before you realize the day is done. 

This is an extremely powerful word which helps accomplish what is sought to be done. The end result is self independence and feeling proud. Obstacles and phases in life are inevitable but developing self understanding, self awareness and finding motivation will aid with the ‘pushing through’ process.  I highly recommend everyone to silently chant these words in your mind in hopes that it will ease your journey, push you through lazy times, and overcome difficult mounds. Cheers!

Written By: Julie Quan. Copyright © 2013 · All Rights Reserved

Article also published on by alexandrumah

I’m Like this Because of You!

So many characteristics in this world: strong forward individuals, upfront, uptight, anxious, kind, positive, and the list goes on.  One will never really know another person’s experiences and what they’ve been through to shape their being, unless you will have ‘walked in their shoes’ (so people say). This is impossible as everyone’s experiences are different regardless of how similar they may be.

            One of the biggest life’s lessons I’ve learned is that outcomes can turn to many different paths in your life based on personal reaction. How you react to a situation impacts the outcome on all scales of life. Take for example working in a medical industry. I have been working in the medical field for about 10 years and along the way I have met numerous amounts of people, patients, families, residents, nurses, and so on. There are so many different individuals and characteristics sometimes one is bound to have difficulty getting along with at least one person you’ve met. I had a colleague once responded by eye rolling and slamming her papers after I had politely asked for help with a patient. Although my mind was going insane feeling like I wanted to wrestle her WWF, I decided to confront her in a calm manner and professionally talk about the situation. She then replied apologetically and admitted that she had not realized her actions. I currently still work with this individual and the situation never occurred again. (not with me to say the least). 

 Just talking professionally may not work for everyone, some may become confrontational and so on, but the importance lies on how to pick and choose your battles and how to react better to a situation no matter how angry and frustrated you are.

Personal experiences, how we are taught and what we choose to internalize throughout the years mould humans. What you feel and what you know is completely subjective. What you deem as friendly may not be the same for another. Ill feelings towards another because of what they say or do may cause a chain reaction from the way you react.

 The individual may have developed certain behaviors based on experiences they’ve had over the years, maybe they are defensive or have trust issues for a reason. Regardless, being friends with someone may not be necessary but finding balance and being cordial is possible. Thus, re-evaluate a situation, think things through, and then react. This will make for a more peaceful process in life with work, marriage, family, and friendships. Good Luck!

Written by: Julie Quan. Copyright © 2013 · All Rights Reserved
Copyright © 2009 · All Rights Reserved
Copyright © 2009 · All Rights Reserved

Copyright © 2009 · All Rights Reserved
Work also published on by alexandrumah

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

the bitch

Okay, so I work in a profession with a plethora of strong personalities. Despite what I thought I knew about people, I'm continuously learning everyday in how to socialize with these people (because I have to) and how to conform in certain situations. I'm generally an optimistic person but I am human nonetheless. Now i know many of you can relate when it comes to that 'specific' individual who for some reason has this "I am the best and bow down to me" complex. If you don't know one, then you might be one. In my reasoning I'd like to categorize them partially as bullies. This complex is a 'front' to hide poor self confidence and feelings of inferiority. Oh these poor fragile individuals.

     Let's face it, trying to be civil absolutely sucks when attempting to reason with 'complex' type people. Trying to be 'professional' about things, when in reality you just want to knock their teeth out. Reasoning or confronting is useless because it's probably a long developed trait that is not easily altered. People don't change, you change. The last thing is to be angry and end a conversation or situation poorly because ultimately you'll either end up feeling foolish or more frustrated. Just move on people, be angry, dislike them, but move on. It's so cliche but its not worth the effort, time, brain space, or energy to focus on ridiculous people. If confrontation is what makes you feel better then go for it! to each their own. Anyway this is my daily rant....I hate stupid stuck up people.

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

The Depleted Soul

Nothing like the hustle and bustle of life: exercising for fitness, eating 'healthy', cooking for the family, spending time with children, making time for significant others, obligations to responsibilities and work, while at the same time wanting to make time for yourself. Then you see these dreamy vacation advertisements ensuring people that there is 'more to life' than what is. 

Without a doubt this is a success driven society we live in today, everyone is always on the 'go go go', focused on technology, eyes centered on miniature screens filled with minor mumble jumble "lol", "haha", "i'll be there soon", agenda's packed with appointments, and news filled with tragedies, politics, and worries. 

Life will never stop, and responsibilities are inevitable but the question is:

when will we ever stop, rest, and be present?

      I am one of those life's driven people, I set high standards for myself and wish to accomplish a chalk full of things on my bucket list, and don't get me wrong they're great and it's necessary and a part of life to have goals and to succeed. Yet when was the last time you went to a party with friends without pulling out your phone to text or talk to others? When was the last time you took a break from work without worrying about money? The latter point was huge for me. Whenever having time off from work I would always pick up extra hours to ensure made a certain minimum, I was exhausted without actually realizing it. Extra money was nice but the toll my body took from fatigue was overwhelming in all parts, internally, physically, and mentally. It was unsafe for patients and close ones to be around me because it created this ball of negativity.

I know my limits. 

I took a one week minor vacation, not necessarily going anywhere but being present where I am. Resting because it was needed, and sleeping because I was so sleep deprived. No overly intense work outs, catching up with friends, doing things I've wanted to do and haven't done in a long time.

Life is filled with personal obligations and burdens of the world but sometimes you need to know your limits and to rest when necessary. Being depleted won't make you efficient in work or family life.

Monday, December 03, 2012

Hubby Talent

I must say I'm one of the luckiest women in the world I'm not filthy rich, I don't own mounds of fashionable Louis Vuitton bags, or drive a Benz... But I do have a husband that cooks. He's great at it and what better way to a woman's soul than a man who cooks. Recently the hubby has been into storing his light spiced kim chi. This Kim chi is very flavorful, non oily and moderately spicy. It is a combination of various pickled vegetables that you eat as a side dish with rice or meats.

I find most Kim Chi sold in stores very soft, flat, and lacking flavor. The hubby likes to add carrots, and a special ingredient that gives it that 'zing' for your taste buds. It leans more towards the sweet and zesty with a crunch. 



I absolutely love to eat, what woman doesn't? So I would like to know what hubby talent does your guy have that you'd like to give a shout out for?? I use the term 'hubby' loosely, it can be any guy in your life that brings you joy, your boyfriend, best friend, hubby or whomever. Remember no matter how big or small the talent, as long as it brings joy to your life that's all that matters! ;) 

Cheers and Happy Lovin!

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Change...oh not that again!

Two days ago I had the opportunity to attend a conference called "focus on the 90% and not the 10%" by Darci Lang. I have to say it was the absolute "reset" and reminder that I needed. As much as I knew some of the things that was brought up during this conference life just blinded me with negative emotions, anger, and some sort of void that was left unfilled....I forgot in this moment in time all the things I preached. 

Among the numerous things I learned, if there was one main point that I can share with the world would be  

that we cannot change people

We can only change ourselves and how we think. People can only change themselves when they are willing and ready but we cannot change people. Of course! I thought...I knew this! We all know this! but how many times do we sit here blaming others for the way they are, hoping they will change for the better. It's all in how we choose to approach matters.

I have a loved one whom I blamed for a long time, they have anger management issues, repeatedly bring up past matters that have long gone, they live a good life without giving thanks, they have outrageous public outbursts of anger for smallest matters that are easily fixable. I blamed this loved one for a long time, for my anger, for the way I think and how I feel in aspects of my life. but I never focused on the good things this person has done, the reasons why they did the things they did, and the setting they grew up in which molded their behavior. My reaction towards them only further aggravated the situation, I needed to change...

We've all heard the phrase nothing difficult in life comes easy, and change is one of them. It is almost guaranteed that if you can attempt and succeed at this, you will see a difference in your life. You will think others have changed when really it is just how you've approached situations, how you perceive life because it is you that has changed.

Sunday, November 04, 2012

My Turn to Talk

     Believe it or not you are one of the most powerful  individuals on this earth, you don't have to be a large figure head to make people listen, agree, or spread news of what you say. Everyone has leadership potential but it is the credibility you build that allows others to believe you more. If you're one to 'cry wolf' each and every time chances are people won't listen. One aspect to being a leader is to speak up.

     Whether it is the work place or home life, if you have a chance to take a leadership role why not go for it. Everyone seems to be afraid to be out spoken, afraid of responsibility, afraid of consequences..even I have self doubts but we are all entitled to speak how we feel. There are reasons why we say the things we do and if it is to improve or to benefit 'the whole' then why not? Speak your mind and take on leadership. Of course you can be timid, follow and conform to the crowd and never speak up in the work place. This may be unhealthy as you may brew in anger from the inside which may slowly lead to burn out, or you can speak your mind (with hopes they are with a good approach) without remorse, and release any frustrations or share any great ideas you may have. I won't lie sometimes it's hard to make people listen, but eventually they do.

     People listen more then you think, people repeat your ideas and statements to others when you're not around. How do I know this? because my ideas and what I've stated to others have ran through the cycle of gossip and has been repeated back to me. So, if you've always wanted to speak up here's your chance, don't wait till tomorrow because you are a powerful individual, what you say will have an effect on others. Here's your moment to shine! be a leader and speak your mind! 


Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Being Truthful With Yourself

"You can control what you say and how you say it, but you can't control how others receive these words" was what my educator used to tell me. I believe this statement to be true in every sense. I recently encountered a situation whereby 'this person' confronted me regarding a incident. On my part I had to swallow my pride and apologize for the situation, rather than compromising 'this person' placed all blame on me, made me look foolish in front of others, lectured me as a child, and reacted as though the incident was all based solely on my responsibility.

'This person' clearly knew the consequences on what was about to occur, yet lied about it. Rather than taking appropriate steps to prevent any mishaps they waited for consequences to occur and began to point fingers at the next person. (as in this case me). I can honestly say I felt terrible and very belittled. 

Most situations can be prevented if all culprits take appropriate measures to prevent mistakes from occurring, it's not just "your fault". I knew the truth of what happened, and despite that this person pointed fingers at me telling me that it is 'my fault' and that is is 'my responsibility'...I know the truth. 

Be the bigger person, apologize for your part. If the other side does not acknowledge their wrongs there is nothing you can do to change their perceptions. Live truthfully, live honestly with yourself. You'll be able to move on with life with ease and without any hold-backs. Live freely and be at peace with your soul before you can be at peace with all other aspects of your life.

Thursday, October 04, 2012

The Happy Bug

"I don't gotta lot'a education, I don't gotta lot'a nothing,
but I gotta lot'a personality, it's the gift that God gave me, so I just like to use this gift to brighten up everybody's day"
Panda Ross

     It's so easy to lose track of trying to achieve the ultimate happiness. High stress work environments, drama in the family, co workers, financial issues, kids, trying to catch up with what we call life. It truly is an on going cycle, and despite how positive I want to be I find myself also becoming a victim of being the 'complainer'. Just recently while watching the 'x factor' I found one of the contestants very intriguing. 

She appears to me like the epitome of happiness, with a soulful voice so soothing it makes you forget the troubles surrounding you. She is positive with a boisterous laughter so contagious that it makes me feel almost ashamed to be stressed about amendable situations, and or minor things that don't require being stressed about. 

Negative influences, complainers, from verbal to minor body language can really affect your day, from how your day begins to how it ends. Continuing this will only damper other people's happiness. We need the happiness reminder from time to time, and for me it was this one woman. Watch this video and hopefully it will remind you to be happy and live the simple life. Surround yourself by positive influences trust me it will make a whole world of difference. 

Make sure you guys shut off the music to the right to listen to the video! Cheers!

Thursday, September 06, 2012

A Breath of Fresh Air....

As much as I hope to be a positive influence on others, I too experience the inevitable stress. Forces so strong I could almost cry every day..maybe for even pointless reasons...possibly because internally I am a worrisome individual. Daily stressors come with life it can either be limited and dealt with or your can fear it, be angered and run away. When you find yourself on the verge of a are entitled to a much needed break.

Regardless of where you are in life thinking of where, how, and when you'll make it through just stop. Continuing on the same routine and patterns and being unhappy furthers the burnout. Breaks and vacations are wonderful, despite it being one day, two days, or a week long is a HUGE breath of fresh air that energizes the soul.

      Take it from me, a break does not require a large amount of spending, I always thought I should 'get away, go on a vacation, go to the bahamas' etc..jealous of others that are able to do so. Time and finances doesn't permit me to. Therefore, I decided to take a trip 3 and a half hours away for the long weekend. There I spent my time hiking two hours uphill on a mountain by moraine lake, the hike seemed long and thready, hills were steep and it was cold and was an endless hike nevertheless, or what seemed to be anyhow. Yet on this endless walk, just midway on the edge finally......... a beautiful waterfall.

      The air so cold that fog would appear on every exhale, but the water was so warm. Every view as breath taking as the next it was well worth cold and the long distance.

Taking a break recycles the human spirit in every way possible. It allows you to regain who you are, to remember where you are at the present moment, to release any bad feelings that you had, and to relive again. 

Despite whatever status you stand at in life, remember you are entitled to a break, why entitled you say? It means YOU deserve it, for all the stressors and obstacles life gives to us, we deserve this precious moment of fresh air. 



Friday, August 31, 2012

Oh humility how i hate you so....

     One of the utmost worst feelings that encourages patience but forces a swallowing of pride is humility. As a person I don't think I could ever degrade another person in public or look down on others based on whatever their status is in life. Unfortunately there are those that do, possibly a co worker, an acquaintance or a random person. This feeling can cut like a sharp knife, open wounds that can bleed out feelings of embarrassment, anger, or pure sadness. 

How should one react? defensive with fight words? run away and hide? Its easy isn't it just to follow our instincts and use fight or flight, but I can honestly say blessed with experiencing humility builds tolerance. You learn to act in a professional and appropriate manner. Doing so will lessen further embarrassment as you've not stooped to such low levels unlike the opposing view. You'll most definitely be angered, you'll wish you've said 'this and that' but in the long run you'll thank yourself because essentially life moves on. That one microscopic moment will mean nothing in your entire lifespan of significant memories. That one moment you spent arguing is wasted breath on a non important person in your life. Realistically, shit does happen and humility does SUCK....but its how you handle the situation so that you don't further suffer the aftermath. 

You could either be confrontational until your face turns blue, then think about the situation when you got home and feel embarrassed for acting like a total idiot...OR ..You could talk in a calm and appropriate manner, admit when you are wrong then go home at the end of the day not give a two shits about the situation because you have moved on. Which one will you choose?